Countdown to Korea — Feelings on having just 7 days until I leave

Alternative title: an excuse to post all of my Grad pictures taken by cms photography — Cristina u are the best.

When i was 14 and dreaming of taking the leap and moving abroad to South Korea, there were so many obstacles. For example: umm… getting through middle school? LOL. High school? Graduating college? Applications, visas, logistics, etc… The list was never ending, and it seemed like the day would never come. No one expected me to follow through with this dream I had so early on, and even I had my doubts.

But here we are, and I leave on the 16th of August, 7 days from now. I’m extremely excited and proud and nervous and so so sad? but also happy to start a new chapter and finally tackle this huge adventure.

I’m beginning to pack my bags, squeeze in final coffee and lunch dates, spend some extra time with my family and boyfriend, sell the belongings I can’t take, and give my puppy extra cuddles.

The main thing I’m feeling right now is gratitude. I am so lucky to have a family who supports me and my crazy, far fetched plans for my life. I’m so grateful to my amazing boyfriend who asked me to be his girlfriend KNOWING I was leaving in the fall and wanting to give long distance our best shot anyways. My friends constantly reassure me that they’re nocturnal anyways and the time difference will actually improve our communication skills (Hi Mya <3). I’ve cried on so many shoulders throughout this process, but celebrated little wins like officially signing a contract and securing the job with those very same people.

I couldn’t have done it without them, and I honestly don’t know what I will do without them once I’m there on my own.

As far as August 16th goes, I can’t sleep at night i’m so excited, and I’m also dreading it at the same time. I love new experiences and adventures, but moving to a different continent, at age 21, completely alone, without speaking the language and knowing virtually no one is TERRIFYING.

Sometimes i act like I have it all together and that challenges like this don’t phase me, but they do!

I’ve been a mess for the past few weeks. Whenever my boyfriend and I talk about it, it just always ends in me having a meltdown. 4 years at the same school, and we just happen to meet 4 months before it’s all over. I purposely avoided relationships throughout college because deep in my heart I already knew that this was something I wanted to do, but God had other plans for me; plans that would make leaving much more of a challenge and much more heartbreaking than I ever anticipated.

And the state of the world isn’t helping matters whatsoever. I hate that we aren’t back to normal, I hate that illness is still literally ravaging the planet, nearly a year and half later. As a result, with the way it’s looking I probably won’t be able to have visitors, and I won’t be able to leave the country to do any of the traveling I had anticipated doing in the first place. The possibility of travel is what led 14 year old Emma to decide to teach in South Korea anyways! So lately I’ve definitely been questioning my decision to make such a big leap in such an uncertain time.

Additionally, I thought I qualified for a quarantine exemption. On July 1st, South Korea lifted some sanctions and there were a few categories of people who could qualify for bypassing the quarantine….. and then the delta variant hit. The week before I went to the embassy to obtain the exemption and my visa, I was no longer eligible. Neither was anyone going to South Korea, unless it was for a funeral.

So that effectively cut my time remaining in the United States in half; at this point I thought I had 5 weeks left, and it turns out I had barely three weeks. Although the two weeks of quarantine might not seem like a big deal, It was an important two weeks back at home. My brother and Mom’s birthdays, visiting all my friends at school one last time, spending time with my boyfriend (he took a whole week off to be with me and I will literallllyyyyyy be in South Korea. Now I’m probably going to force him to be nocturnal for that week so he can still spend it with me while I literally decay in my quarantine room in the government facility.)

It was also two more weeks of work, and paying for a 2 week stay in what is essentially a hotel with meals delivered three times a day is NOT cheap, and its essentially like losing another two weeks of pay. My venmo is Emma-sturgeon-1 if you feel like contributing to the cause LOL. but seriously??? plz help.

As if that’s not all, on top of that, I feel like i’m gonna go stir-crazy sitting completely alone in a room for two weeks, especially with the time difference. If Hulu in South Korea doesn’t have all 35 seasons of survivor (I’ve recently been HOOKED) i will probably die in there.

I’ve never lived alone before, I’ve never spent Christmas without my family. This will be my second birthday I’ll spend alone though, so I know I’m capable of having fun regardless of who my company is. Pray that I make friends quickly, that I’m able to pick up the language, that adulting in a foreign country would come easily to me (yeah right lol but always worth a prayer!).

But besides the shock of having my time cut in half and the dread of the initial month there (quarantine, having to set up a Korean bank account, get an alien registration card, find a phone plan, figure out what time of day I can Facetime my family, figure out how to grocery shop in a country where I can’t read etc.), I am truly excited for what is to come.

If I can’t travel throughout the year, hopefully I can save up and do a whole backpacking stint at the end of my year-long contract. Maybe I’ll be able to learn a new language quickly. Maybe I’ll meet some amazing people. Who knows!

To sum it up, moving to South Korea is obviously going to be the adventure of a lifetime, but there are a million factors that have piled on top of each other that make it a lot more daunting than I originally anticipated and readied myself for.

Here are some stupid things I will miss: